✨ "The healing process is there in service of your life, not the other way around. Do the healing in order to live." – Kira Julius Kira Julius is a German-Danish horse trainer and equine assisted practitioner whose career has taken her from working young horses in Tanzania at 16, to eight years alongside Australian warmblood specialist Will Rogers — first in the Netherlands, then Germany — to therapeutic work with autistic children and families across Germany, Denmark, Ireland, and the UK. She now runs her own practice through horserealms.com, working with horses, families, and individuals at the intersection of horsemanship and resilience.What makes Kira's perspective unusual is that she has lived the subject she now teaches. A lifelong relationship with anxiety and fear around horses, a family crisis at 18 when her father suffered a stroke that pulled her into an early adult role, and years inside the hyper-demanding world of sport horse training — including a period where her own anxiety became so acute she could barely ride — all of it has shaped a practitioner who speaks from earned experience, not theory.In this conversation, Rupert and Kira go deep on what resilience actually means — for horses, for humans, and for the practitioners who work with both. They move through the groundwork methodology Kira developed starting sensitive warmbloods, the specific exercises that release tension and build connection, and how those same principles apply when working with autistic children. They explore why always being calm may be the wrong goal, how to move through fear rather than wait for it to pass, and why the trauma conversation risks tipping into a place that keeps people stuck. This is a wide-ranging, experience-backed conversation that will resonate with anyone who works with horses, with neurodivergent individuals, or with their own inner life.If you want to support the show, you can do so at Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/LongRideHome🔍 What You'll Learn in This Episode How curiosity overrides anxiety — and why doing the thing is often more healing than waiting until you feel ready Why "always being calm" is not the goal for horses or humans, and what heart rate variability tells us about genuine resilience How to distinguish between protective fear and anxious mental noise — and how gut instinct becomes the tool for telling them apartThe groundwork methodology Kira used starting sensitive warmbloods: approach and retreat, shoulder yields, hindquarter yields, and why crossing the midline triggers BDNF and neuroplasticityWhy the shoulder-in position is both a tension-release tool and a safety tool — and how having it reliably in place can get a handler out of serious troubleHow Kira's experience of her father's stroke at 18 shaped her understanding of grief, family strain, and the cost of going into management mode when you're struggling yourselfHow Kira's own severe anxiety crisis mid-career — when she could barely get on a horse — became the turning point that led her toward therapeutic work with humansWhy seeing possibilities rather than problems is the key reframe in both horse training and equine assisted work with neurodivergent clientsWhy the trauma conversation risks becoming a place people stay rather than move through — and what the spiral model of grief and healing offers insteadHow projecting limitations onto horses or children blocks their capacity to surprise us, and why listening to the person in front of you matters more than the story others gave youWhy joy and play are not extras in equine assisted work — they are the mechanism by which change happensWhy practitioners who want horses or clients to make big changes need to be making changes themselves🎤 Memorable Moments from the Episode[00:12:38] Kira explains why waiting to feel "ready" often keeps anxiety alive — the doing of the thing is what changes your storyline[00:15:00] Kira describes what happened when her father had a stroke at 18 — and how managing practical needs meant disconnecting from her family emotionally at the same time[00:30:17] Kira takes us inside the Will Rogers yard: how they started sensitive warmbloods using groundwork, approach and retreat, and the principle of explaining the human world to the horse rather than demanding compliance[00:37:12] The connection between lateral movement, crossing the midline, and BDNF — why these classical exercises produce neuroplasticity in horses just as they do in humans[00:45:16] Why shoulder yields and hindquarter yields are not just gymnastic tools but safety tools — and how they can get a handler out of serious trouble when a horse reacts unexpectedly[00:49:08] Tarp training in front of thousands of people: how Will Rogers conditioned sharp warmbloods to treat a crashing plastic sheet as a signal to exhale, not explode[00:56:57] Kira's own anxiety crisis at Will's yard — when the pressure to produce calm horses while managing a conflict between the horse's needs and client expectations sent her into a spiral she couldn't ride through[01:00:21] The "calm at all times" myth — why both Rupert and Kira push back on the idea that triggering is a failure, and what Rupert's experience walking with lions in the Kalahari reveals about appropriate fear[01:12:23] Kira reframes the goal with horses: not calm at all times, but maintaining connection through whatever arises[01:39:14] Working with an autistic child: why listening to what the person is actually telling you matters more than the story others have given you about them[01:54:00] The grief spiral: going down to meet it, then spiraling back up to build from it — and why many people only do the first half[02:05:35] Rupert's challenge to practitioners: if you want a horse or child to make a big change, what changes are you currently making yourself?📚 Contact, Projects, and Resources MentionedKira Julius – Horse trainer and equine assisted practitioner https://horserealms.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/kira.horses_/ New Trails Learning Systems – Horse Boy Method, Movement Method & Takhin Equine Integrationhttps://ntls.coPatreon Support https://www.patreon.com/LongRideHomeAlan Pogue – Trick training / Imagine a Horse https://imaginehorse.com🌍 Follow UsLong Ride Homehttps://longridehome.comhttps://facebook.com/longridehome.lrhhttps://instagram.com/longridehome_lrhhttps://youtube.com/@longridehomeNew Trails Learning Systemshttps://ntls.cohttps://facebook.com/horseboyworldhttps://instagram.com/horseboyworldhttps://youtube.com/newtrailslearningsystems📊 Affiliate DisclosureLinks to books and products may include affiliate tracking. 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